Now, that being said, here's a blurb I wrote on the second day here, after taking the bus to school one morning, and then subsequently looking into the optional bus pass. I'm mostly just putting it here because it makes me giggle and I figured it might make y'all giggle too:
I don't want to buy a bus pass. It's sixty euro, which is over eighty dollars. For one month. No way. I'll walk. But the problem is they make it really hard not to buy a pass. For one, my dorm is about a 35-minute walk from the University. Secondly, they make it very confusing if you do want to take the bus but just pay in euro for one trip.
You mount the bus, and all of the students in front of you have a handy-dandy ($80) pass. When you get to the driver you hold out some change, and this signifies that you have no pass and would like to pay the old-fashioned way. Normally they nod and give you your change. At least that's how it's been in every European country I've ever lived in or visited.
But today I mounted the bus, ready to pay for one ride because I still didn't quite know where the University was. I showed him maybe two euro in change and he just looked at me.
I asked him, "Wie viel?" (How much?)
He responded, "Für was?" (For what?)
I looked around, thinking he was joking, and then saw he was completely serious. I didn't quite know how to proceed without pointing out the obvious: We're in a bus. What do you think I want to pay you for, lunch?
So I said slowly, "Ich will zur Uni gehen." (I want to go to the university.)
He then said in response, "Das ist falsch," and I think you can guess what that means.
I stared at him. What's false? I wanted to ask. That I want to go to the university? Or the certificate on your dash that says "City's Cleanest Bus"?
I then decided to just get this over with because I was getting tired of grabbing the yellow pole every time he almost tipped the mammoth onto its side.
Oh, yes, he was driving during all of this. I'm not surprised that I didn't see a certificate for "City's Safest Bus."
Finally he made a big show of leaning forward (while driving) and messing with the computer mounted on his dash. After thirty seconds I was trying to figure out how to say, "I'll pay when I get off," because I was seriously concerned about the headlines: City's Cleanest Bus Crashes Into Oncoming Car." The byline would be: "Caused by American trying to pay earnest bus driver with change. Thirty dead."
But before I could come up with anything to avoid our seemingly inevitable demise, he finally leaned back and said, "Zwei fünfzig." (Two fifty.)
I looked at the two euro in my hand, did a quick (probably not-quite-accurate) calculation in my head, thought Four dollars--give or take--for a bus ride? For a little over a mile?! and then dug fifty cents out of my pocket. I wanted the exact amount, because God forbid if he had to give change. That would be like handing a child a chainsaw.
So I dropped my father's hard-earned $4 into the tray and wandered toward the middle of the bus. I got off about three minutes later.
No joke. $4 for three minutes.
Maybe this is a fault in my personality, but this just makes me spite the bus system even more. I could give in and buy a pass, I suppose, like everyone else in my dorm seems to have done. But...nope. Not happening.
Instead I wandered around and found the quickest way from my dorm to the university.
Current record: 20 minutes.
Cathy: 1
Transit system: 0
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